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Short Stories
Brian ……..I had been given a couple of other possible contacts – Brian likes to go to church every Sunday and to the pub when he has a free evening. I contacted the minister, Andy, and we met with Tommy - Brian knows him from the pub. I think it was Andy who came up with the idea of finding out who Brian’s friends were by holding a Skittles Evening at the pub and opening it up to all who know him. Posters for ‘Brian’s Skittle Night’ were done and put up in the pub and church. 22 people came with 8 people agreeing to be involved in the circle after. The landlady made some great sausage and chips. Everyone played in a skittles competition which was won by a pub regular with the landlady coming second – she put her prize money back to Brian so we saved the £7 for the next meeting. Dominic has a wonderful gift! Dominic has profound and complex needs. I first met him in a big ‘mental handicap hospital’. He was on a ward with another 20 people who have profound and complex needs. It was a very depressing place but the one thing that was always worth going in for was to see Dominic. You see he has the biggest smile and greatest sparkle in his eyes in the world and his smile is there as soon as you look at him. Every time you look at him. He is in supported living now and he still has that smile. Even on the day he fell over and lost his two front teeth – he was still smiling even though it must have hurt a lot. But, I hear you say, a smile isn’t that much though is it? The answer is no, a smile isn’t much, not really, except that he always has a smile for anyone and it makes you feel good every time you get one. Now who do you know that gives you a smile every time you look at them - even if they are having a bad day? Giftedness “There are many times when I see the pain on his face as he struggles to communicate. These moments are intensely painful for me as well, because I know that if I were in his situation – comprehending everything around me and yet unable to express myself - I’d want to slit my wrists. But just at the moment when Adam’s frustration is most intense and I expect to see him fall into a rage or despair, something changes – or rather Adam changes something. I don’t know how to describe this, except that he appears to make a conscious choice to see the situation as ridiculous. He’ll take a deep breath, as though he is letting the frustration slide off his shoulders, and begin to laugh. This is not the laughter of an idiot. It is the laughter of a person who chooses to see humour in his own discouragement, and to me it is not only intelligent but wise. Living with Adam, loving Adam, has taught me a lot about the truth. He has taught me to look at things in themselves, not at the value a brutal and often senseless world assigns to them. As Adam’s mother I have been able to see quite clearly that he is no less beautiful for being called ugly, no less wise for appearing dull, no less precious for being seen as worthless. And neither am I. Neither are you. Neither are any of us.” From Expecting Adam, by Martha Beck Person centred planning - what kinds of things have people planned? Alec got together with family and friends and he has a plan to help him find a job and somewhere to live. Ben has had help from his social worker and family to plan helping him stay in the flat he lived in with his mother after she went into care. Clara has a plan to help her make more friends. Darren has a plan to help him keep doing the many things he does. He had help from his mother and father but his mother died and he and his father are now getting help from other people to keep doing those things. Ed has a plan to help him get more time to paint trains. He is very good at this and wants to do it more. Frances wants a plan to help her cope when she is upset by her neighbours. Gail has planned with her friends many things including going to college, find more friends, to get on better with her family, decorate her lounge, play badminton, go abseiling, having a holiday and play rounders in the park. She has already had a plan which helped her find a new place to live. Harry will be moving soon and may want to plan how he will move and keep in touch with friends.
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