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Parents Matter
This project is no longer active as the funding has expired. Parents Matter is a new project for parents from black and minority ethnic communities with teenagers who display behaviours that challenge. It is based in Birmingham and Sandwell and is funded by the Department for Education & Skills Family Policy Unit. This project works in partnership with the Community Education & Training Academy (CETA), an educational organisation based in Birmingham with a wonderful track record of successful parenting courses for black lone parents. Behaviours that challenge? What does that mean – a new “politically correct” way of referring to antisocial activities? Er, no, the truth is a tad more complex than that. There are various ways in which social workers, doctors and teachers use the term, and the fact none of them is guaranteed to reflect a family’s own experience only adds to the confusion. In our understanding the parent may be challenged directly by a young person’s behaviour, or indirectly by the reaction of others. Our approach is to start by asking parents why they find the young person's behaviour challenging. This question may not be as obvious as it seems, for there are many ways in which a parent can feel challenged. Aggressive or otherwise inconsiderate behaviour is one way, of course, but so too are difficulties around schooling and barriers to accessing appropriate support. There are also the reactions (including racist and disabling stereotyping) of others to the young person, as well as communication breakdown as a result of language barriers operating within the family. Last but not least, parents whose world views are underpinned by a traditional spiritual faith and accompanying moral code can find themselves severely challenged when western influences have a conflicting effect on their child’s behaviour. Clearly then, behaviours that challenge is a term carefully shaped to avoid preconceived attributions of blame and to embrace a range of stress factors that may apply with particular force in black and minority ethnic communities. Parents – if they are to enjoy trust, respect and confidence – need to be seen by the young person as positive role models. The Parents Matter project is all about supporting the parent in empowering themselves and thereby regaining the esteem of their children. Our support is person centred, and therefore variable from one situation to another. It may be a listening ear and help with access to other organisations and services. Or it may be an invitation to attend one a learning programme, set up by ourselves or CETA, where parents have the opportunity to share experiences and learn from the experiences of others. We work in a flexible way to show parents that, though the difficulties are real and not to be underestimated, lost trust can be regained, respect rediscovered and confidence rebuilt. |
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